…is dependent on context. It is dynamic, with a continual relation to external and internal forces. How then do I behave as an independent person? My thoughts and feelings are not conscious, but afterthoughts. I would like to believe that I am autonomous, but I doubt myself when I think and feel in ways that I do not want.
Is it then a matter of will and intention? Decision making is autonomous, but context based at the same time. Does this context make it dependent? You cannot decide without context as this forms the basis of the decision. If context involves past, present, and future contexts then is it that the older you are the less autonomous you are?
Dependence is normally for the young, and the older you get the more independence you have. With age comes experience, which form into contexts, these contexts allow someone to infer. You are drawing from prior knowledge for cause and effect in the present and future. It is hard to rationalise that ignorance is free, but it seems to make sense when you base your decisions on contexts.
It seems that autonomy resides on a bell curve of ignorance, with the extremities possessing autonomy. You could be completely ignorant and have no regard for anything but yourself. You could be completely informed and have no regard for anything but yourself. But to reside in the middle, feigning both ignorance and information, is a non-autonomous person. Returning to my state of mind, I feel non-autonomous but possess the ability for autonomy. I have two paths for autonomy, complete ignorance and complete information. I do not believe it is possible to be completely ignorant. The only chance for complete ignorance is the moment you gain consciousness; forever after you are building contexts. In that case, I would like to be fully informed. Is it possible to be completely informed about your state of mind?
To think is to do. I can think about my state of mind and move towards a state of autonomy. Although, it seems a continual process. Can you possess complete knowledge about yourself? Maybe in your dying moments it would be true, but for the continuum of life you will always be a student. Would this continual pursuit in self-knowledge create the effect of autonomy? I believe so.